All Access Heaven Kit - Gag Gift

Description

It is now possible to enjoy your sin filled life and buy your way into Heaven. How does an afterlife of eternal pain and suffering sound? Not so good – which is why we are here to help. Our organization’s sole purpose is to allow you the opportunity to secure your spot in Heaven before it’s too late. Yes! The contents of this package are all you will need to guarantee a safe and sound trip into the Heavens. This kit is backed by our **0% money back guarantee. If your journey to heaven isn’t successful then you will be refunded the full amount paid for your reservation! No more uncertainties – You’re going up! **********************************************- This exclusive package contains all of the necessary materials to get you into Heaven and experience all of the elite areas that are normally off-limits to normal citizens. -Heavenly issued I.D. card. What’s citizenship without a way to prove it? -Official heavenly issued certificate of reservation. Let people now you are going up! -First-class ticket to Heaven aboard the exclusive Airway to Heaven. Why walk the stairs when you can fly? -Heaven **1 Mini Informational Guide. Don’t be a victim of culture shock and get acquainted with the land. -VIP pass. This all-access pass grants access to the exclusive areas including the land of milk and honey. -Introductory letters.